At what cost?

What are you willing to sacrifice?  For the honor of the King?

What am I?

When I have a question in my heart, the Lord is faithful to answer that question during times I'm quiet with Him, and listen. 
My ears hear a voice behind them saying 'This is the way, walk in it'.  (Isaiah 30:21).
Today I sought his presence with a burden weighing heavy on my heart.  And like EVERY TIME...  he didn't answer 'yes' or 'no'.

 But he DID answer my heart by saying I need to come to him continually.... praying.... asking.... without wearying... day and night.

And then he will answer quickly. 
(Luke 18:1-8).

He usually answers like this.  Not a "this is the answer" but rather.......a prelude to an answer.  A preliminary action. 

Honestly though...........  this answer scared me.
 Because  asking/praying/continually/day and night/without wearying......... comes with a cost.  ANOTHER sacrifice.  And I asked myself silently.....  how many MORE sacrifices Lord?

 Man.... he really knows how to expose the heart of an issue. 

An infection, if left untreated, will kill the whole body.  Cleaning the wound is not pretty.  I've seen 'Gone with the Wind'.  Ridding a body of infection comes with a price. 

Seems like the Lord heard my prayer, and answered it by saying.....  'Yes, my daughter.  I hear you, and I will answer speedily.  But THIS is what needs to happen before that.  Are you willing to sacrifice your prized possession to get it? 

And as I write this right now....... I realize something detrimental....

I thought I was asking a different question entirely... and he answers me with another question.....

Just like Jesus always did.

 He's asking me to give up an idol. 

Lord, I feel scared to start this journey in giving up this idol.  I've started so many times before.... and not been victorious.  I'm scared that if I start, I'll fail. 

But your word to my heart is CLEAR.  I know I must sacrifice my idol in order to hear from you pertaining to this other question. 

Help me, Jesus. YOU be the VICTOR I can't be. 

So, I'll do what he asks.  I'll fight this, for the Honor of the King.  But it won't be easy.
And tomorrow morning, I'll come to him and ask again..... continually... day and night.... and not grow weary.

I CAN'T WAIT to hear the answer next time I ask!  I'll let you know what is said to my heart.
Affectionately-Tracy